September 2019 Student Spotlight: Raina Lin
Raina Lin immigrated to the United States from China 19 years ago. She lives in Rochester with her family and plans to study Accounting at MCC. In her story, “My Pathway to Learn English,” Raina explores the frustrations and rewards of learning a second language.
My Pathway to Learn English
Every morning after I have breakfast, I always check the course materials twice, and then I drive to MCC. Since I am early today, I take my time to walk to the building. The weather is very nice today, and it’s not cold at all which is unusual in February. The sky is really blue, and the birds are chirping and flying from tree to tree. I take a deep breath, and the cold, fresh air wakes up my mind, and I feel energized. I feel happy that I am returning to school, and I can learn more knowledge besides the English. Thinking back about when I just came to United States, speaking was the big pain to me.
When I just came, I lived in New York City for a short time. In there, my husband and I always liked to go to Chinatown to get what we needed for every day. Life there was easy, and I didn’t feel I was in a foreign country because most of the stores and restaurants had Chinese words on the signs, on the price tags, and on the menus. We didn’t need to know or speak in English, but Chinese or Cantonese instead.
After three months there, I got pregnant. I felt weak and was lying in my bed most of the time. One day, my husband asked me: “Babe, you look a bit better today! Here there is a local grocery store nearby, and we need some fruits and vegetables. How about we go shopping and you can have a little exercise, too?” I thought it was just like a grocery store in Chinatown, so I nodded.
When we were in the store, I was stunned because everything was in English, and people there were all foreign faces. I felt nervous and stayed even closer to my husband, and I really wanted to go home. While we were at the line for check-out, my husband suddenly remembered that we forgot the eggs. He told me to stay in line, then he ran to the dairy aisle to get the eggs. I stayed in the check-out line, and I was the third one. I started to worry, and I thought to myself, Since I don’t speak English, what do I need to say if the cashier asks me a question and I don’t understand at all; how much for all the stuff in the cart?; I don’t recognize the bills and the coins well; How much do I need to give to cashier? My heart was pounding hard. I anxiously kept looking back and forth between the dairy aisle and the line, and I wished my husband could see me and come back quickly to “save” me. I wanted to get out of the line badly. Meanwhile, the cashier was scanning the last item for the person before me, and my hands on the shopping cart were sweating. I saw the person started cashing out, and I felt nervous. I took a deep breath, but I didn’t think I could do it. Then I fast turned my shopping cart out of line and headed it to dairy aisle. While I was walking sadly, my husband caught me and asked me why I didn’t stay in line? I whiningly said: “I am scared, and I don’t know what to say. I know nothing! I am sorry!”
“You don’t need to say anything, Babe. Just put the stuff on the conveyor.” He patted my head and continued, “It’s ok. Don’t worry. Let’s stay in this line.”
On the way home, my husband tried to cheer me up, but I still felt sad and ashamed about myself and couldn’t forgive myself. After that day, I didn’t want to go anywhere, and I just cowardly stayed at home. But I couldn’t stop thinking about what I did that day and felt frustrated. I decided to learn English at home. It was hard to learn without a teacher because my dictionary only translated the words for me, and it couldn’t sound them out for me. My husband knew my problem, and he bought me an electric Chinese and English dictionary, and learning became easier. I only needed to type in the Chinese word and hit enter, and it showed the translation in English on the screen, and it also pronounced the word to me when I pressed the sound bottom. It was a really useful tool, and I carried it everywhere I went. I can’t imagine what I would do without it I wouldn’t able to build up the vocabulary fast, and I wouldn’t know how to sound out words in the right way.
Once we moved to Rochester, I felt more anxious because everything here is in English and I had to speak in English, too! I pushed myself to study even more.
While I was learning, I was teaching my kids with some simple English, too. We started reading the picture books and then moved on the easy level of fiction. After my kids went to school, they have become my teachers, and I have learned a lot from them. Year by year, I felt my life seems easier because the more I learn, the more I feel less afraid when I talk to people.
In 2015, I signed up for GED class. Even though I graduated from high school in China, I liked to have one in English. As soon as I had my GED diploma, I was thinking about going to college since my kids are older and they don’t really need that much help as they did before. I talked to my husband and my mom, and they both encouraged me to continue study. My husband said to me: “Don’t worry! Just go for it! I am here for you if you need any help. Do the things that you like!”
I hesitated for 2 years and finally I am here!
I am happy as a fish in the water. I feel my life is fulfilling, and I am grateful for the support from my husband and my family!
ESOL Voices is a collection of stories written by ESOL students at Monroe Community College. This publication highlights our MCC students who come from all over the world. Look for a new story each month. We hope you enjoy our students’ stories as much as we do.
— Katie Leite & Pamela Fornieri, ESOL Program, September 2019